why, hello again!

So, it has been ages since I last posted. I tried to think of a reason but I couldn't really find anything other than the fact that my life has been really low key lately and I guess just a low key lifestyle does not a good blog make. A good blog post requires either crazy awesomeness or ranty worthy badness. I still don't have either of those two things, but I am still going to attempt a post and therefore you must suffer through my drivel. 

Christmas is coming and I am actually excited. I still have no idea what I am going to do but there are many offers on the table, which is nice. Really the most exciting part is Maria and Melissa. I can't believe it has been five months since I have seen either of them. All I can think about is how much I am going to laugh those eight or whatever days they are here. No one can make me crack up like those two and it is going to feel amazing to be able to just bask in it for a full week. 

In other news, Germany is unbearably  cold. I am not the type of person that gets cold easily, not at ALL. In fact, I am the exact opposite. I am always always always too warm when I sleep. It's like when people flip over the pillow to get to the cool side of the pillow, except I need a whole new fresh bed. At home I sleep in a minimum of two different beds per night, but here I am just NEVER warm. I don't think it's so much that Germany is colder degrees wise, but the house is wayyy older and the heating system is not as good. It's kind of nice though because I think because I am cold all the time I haven't put on any weight even though Christmas in Germany=a shit ton of delicious cakes, waffles, and cookies. Not to mention my Adventskalendar and then Nikolaus where I got tonnnnns of chocolate. Oh, yeah, and Gluhwein. 

I had a friend from college who always went on about Christmas in Germany and I always thought to myself "how different could it possibly be?!?" but she was totally right. It's totally lovely. The food is of course an amazing aspect but then their are the Christmas markets which are adorable and sooo fun. There are tons of gorgeous lights and it all just looks so much adorable on Germany's tiny little streets (even if they are terrifying to drive on).

i hate money.

i am feeling so stressed out right now and it is all because of money. it is even more ridiculous because at the moment i have more in my bank account than i ever have had before and it just isn't enough. i have to get christmas presents, have enough money to travel when maria and melissa are here and  i also need to sign up for my next level of german courses. that last one costs 700 euro alone. that is actually a great price considering it is 16 hours a week and four months but gah you have to pay cash in full and you need to sign up considerably in advance. the website says the class is almost full and it doesnt start until march. if i could pay in march that would be great as it would give me plenty of time to save up post christmas destitution but of course it needs to be paid to reserve my spot. i think i'll head over to the school monday or so and see how full they consider almost full and see if they can give me an estimation of when they think it will fill up for good. i remember when i signed up for this class it was yellow for quite a while before it got completely full. it's just german is SO important to me, it's why i came here. to learn the language, and i really can't do it without the classes. they guarantee me 16 hours of complete and total immersion every week and i neeeeeeed that to get better. i'm like hyperventilating right now. you can probably tell as there is nary a paragraph break nor a capital letter in sight. 

GR.

maybe if i write a budget here i will feel better.

my current account balance is around 650 euros. let's say i set aside 200 for christmas gifts. that leaves me with 450. ill get paid 500 euroes on jan 1st which is good because it will rejuice me mid travels. so that brings me to 950 euros, 700 of which needs to be reserved for my class. so 250 for traveling. aka, not enough. its actually super not enough because not is 250 euros not going to cover the traveling but it would leave me penniless for all of january. i need at least 25 euro to get through the month at the very least. it would be a sparse month but since my food and everything is paid for i would just need that for odds and ends here and there.

SIGH. i cant think about this anymore.

goodnight.

I CAVED.

So, I read Twilight.

I was falling massively behind on my reading list so I needed a book I knew I could get through in one sitting and I knew I could totally do that with Twilight.

These are my thoughts:

The characters are laughable. Stephanie Meyer either makes them insanely perfect, or something that bothers me even more, she deliberately gives them absolutely meaningless flaws. They are flaws that merely exist to make it more difficult for people to call her out on her terrible and uninteresting characterizations. Well, more difficult for a 12 year old anyway. 

The magic is also laughable. It's every single Vampire stereotype wrapped into one. Oh, no, correction, it's every GOOD vampire stereotype wrapped into one. Her vampires are strong, beautiful, intelligent and immortal. However, the sun doesn't burn them it makes them SPARKLE. Perhaps you think my summary is making it sound more juvenile than it actually is. Nope. Wrong. The vampires are so shiny they sparkle in sunlight. 

I pretty much have all the same exact criticisms for the book that everyone else does. I just find it totally hilarious that people who love this book most of the time love it for it's "great" romance. That is fucking hilarious. The book has the most ridiculously warped depiction of romance I have ever seen. The characters fall in love with one another before they have even spoken one word to one another. In fact, Bella falls in love with Edward whilst under the impression that he wishes her dead. They both have non existent personalities outside of the fact they love each other and every depiction of their "love" is a much clearer depiction of lust than anything else. And you know what? That is fine with me, books about lust can be great but it drives me insane that this book is parading around as the paragon of the ultimate romance when really it's nothing more than a 500 page exercise in unresolved sexual tension. 

In conclusion, everything about the book was 100 percent predictable and the writing was at times gag inducing.

I started New Moon yesterday.